You may shake your head with painful memories of large dollar amounts lost, and swear on a stack of Bibles that you're going to never again be foolish enough to engage in a shoot-out with the One-Armed Bandit, but who are you kidding? Maybe, with just a little luck, you will be able to resist the call of the slot machine for several weeks, perhaps even a month or two. But you know damn well that you will be back for a rematch at some time. You can not just let that Bandit win so quickly, can you? No way.
It is just a machine, of course, with a "brain" comprised of wires and microchips. You, however, are a living, breathing entity with the capacity for critical thinking and self-reflection. If humankind is to have any hope at all in surviving the worldwide war against machines that surely will come some day, we'd better at least be able to beat the slots. Think of the matter within this kind of sweeping historical context and you shall see that it is not simply a choice but an obligation that you should get back on the horse immediately.
Before launching on your noble quest in defense of humanity, it would be wise to review some basic information and arm yourself with five crucial tips to success.
You may not realize that the slot machine goes on different names in overseas nations. By way of example, within the United Kingdom, it's called a fruit machine (no jokes about British drag queens, please click the following website.) In Australia, the slot is referred to as a "poker machine," which is even more confusing, but what can you expect from a culture that gives outdoor grills the name of just a little girl's toy? (Let it sink in for a minute, you'll get it.)
Anyway, traditional American slot machines are coin-operated and contain three or maybe more reels, which spin any time a lever on the side of the machine is pulled. The machines include a currency detector that validates the cash inserted to play. The equipment typically pays off based on patterns of symbols visible when the reels stop.
OK, enough for the description. Basically, onto those tips that have been promised a number of paragraphs ago:
Become intimately acquainted with each slot machine's payout schedule. Two identical slot machines will often have radically different payouts. This matters, people.
Look for advertised slot machines offering 96-98% paybacks. Most casinos usually have a few banks or carousels of high percentage payback slots, which is the place you should play.
Join the casino players club wherever you gamble regularly. Casinos reward players for money and time spent. Even if you don't hit the jackpot, you may still receive comps like meals, discount hotel rooms, and other perks.
This will be a no-brainer, but only play the slot machines you can afford and only spend cash you can risk losing. Seriously.
Walk away when you are losing and become irritated. Playing slot machines is supposed to be an enjoyable pastime, not only a source of ulcer-inducing frustration. When it's no longer fun, go get a drink and some fresh air.
It is just a machine, of course, with a "brain" comprised of wires and microchips. You, however, are a living, breathing entity with the capacity for critical thinking and self-reflection. If humankind is to have any hope at all in surviving the worldwide war against machines that surely will come some day, we'd better at least be able to beat the slots. Think of the matter within this kind of sweeping historical context and you shall see that it is not simply a choice but an obligation that you should get back on the horse immediately.
Before launching on your noble quest in defense of humanity, it would be wise to review some basic information and arm yourself with five crucial tips to success.
You may not realize that the slot machine goes on different names in overseas nations. By way of example, within the United Kingdom, it's called a fruit machine (no jokes about British drag queens, please click the following website.) In Australia, the slot is referred to as a "poker machine," which is even more confusing, but what can you expect from a culture that gives outdoor grills the name of just a little girl's toy? (Let it sink in for a minute, you'll get it.)
Anyway, traditional American slot machines are coin-operated and contain three or maybe more reels, which spin any time a lever on the side of the machine is pulled. The machines include a currency detector that validates the cash inserted to play. The equipment typically pays off based on patterns of symbols visible when the reels stop.
OK, enough for the description. Basically, onto those tips that have been promised a number of paragraphs ago:
Become intimately acquainted with each slot machine's payout schedule. Two identical slot machines will often have radically different payouts. This matters, people.
Look for advertised slot machines offering 96-98% paybacks. Most casinos usually have a few banks or carousels of high percentage payback slots, which is the place you should play.
Join the casino players club wherever you gamble regularly. Casinos reward players for money and time spent. Even if you don't hit the jackpot, you may still receive comps like meals, discount hotel rooms, and other perks.
This will be a no-brainer, but only play the slot machines you can afford and only spend cash you can risk losing. Seriously.
Walk away when you are losing and become irritated. Playing slot machines is supposed to be an enjoyable pastime, not only a source of ulcer-inducing frustration. When it's no longer fun, go get a drink and some fresh air.
